Fatigue

Oh, how I wish I had a really encouraging, uplifting post to cover the past few days.  But I promised myself I would be completely real.  I am in serious need of a good run.  Maybe I should say I'm in serious need of an easy run.  There have been quite a few truly difficult runs over the past week or so. The 8 mile run on Saturday just about finished me off.  It was partly the distance, partly my lack of water, and mostly the heat.  I'm not so good with heat.

We took a new route that none of us had ever run before.  There was a big section of straight and flat that my running buddies really hated.  Because I'm on a treadmill the other three days of training a week that wasn't so bad for me.  But my body just kind of gave up.  At one point I thought to myself that it would just be easier to get pregnant and deal with that instead of the run.  Obviously I wasn't thinking very clearly.

The last mile or two was pretty bad.  I started to get a bit light-headed and had to walk while I downed some fruit snacks.  Then I pretty much hobbled the last little way back.  I was not helped along by the fact that there was some idiot standing around right by where we were going to finish that started heckling us.  I had a couple of choice words saved up for him until I realized it was the husband of one of my buddies and he was cheering us on.  And he had ice cold water bottles.  Then I decided he was my new best friend.

This morning was another 3 mile run.  It was hard.  My legs were so tired.  I guess that's to be expected after only one day of rest.  Tomorrow I have a five mile run so we will see how that goes.  I just need to remind myself that I don't need to be a hero or a speed demon.  Saturday is a 10 miler.  I've asked them if we can keep it to 9 miles because I'm not sure I'm ready for 10 after last week's run.  The other part of me wants to just push forward.  It will be an easier run because most of it will be down hill through the canyon and earlier in the morning so it won't be so hot.  As I write that out I feel a little more confident about doing it.

I've been trying to think of ways to encourage myself and get past the mental block, so here goes.  I'm no stranger to doing hard things.  There is always some point at which I think I can't possibly go on, that I don't want to, that it's not worth it, or any number of things that make me feel like simply quitting.  Quitting would be easier but there would always be regret that I didn't finish what I started.  The big thing I keep trying to remember is that I built a house.  While I was pregnant.  There were several times I felt like we would be building forever and never actually move in.  Moving day was a year and a half ago, so obviously we did finish building.  I tell myself that this is just one of those times when I feel like I'll be training forever and never cross that finish line.  That helps me get through.  If I could build a house while pregnant I should be able to do anything.  The mental game is just as important and the physical one.

When Long Becomes Medium

Documenting the marathon training is starting to seem a little silly to me, but I know I'll want it in the future.  So, for anyone who isn't interested in yet another running post, this would be one to skip.

Every week I run four times.  The first and third runs are short runs, the second is a medium distance, and the fourth day is the long run.  I've scheduled my runs for Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.  This week the medium run bumped up from four miles to five.  It's amazing to me to think that it was only three and a half weeks ago when I was nervous to run five miles for my first long run. Even more amazing is knowing that in seven weeks the five mile distance will be the short runs in my week.  It's not easy, but it is doable.  I never thought it would be easy.

Probably the hardest thing about upping the miles is the time commitment.  I seem to have a mindset that a workout lasts for around 30 minutes and then you get on with your day.  Five miles, including the warm up, cool down, and stretching, takes me over an hour.  The miles go up just a little at a time so, while it is challenging, the amount of time I spend on the road or on the treadmill is harder than the physical work.  At least it is at this point.  I imagine that when the long runs get past 10 or 12 miles I'll think the physical demands are the hard part.

Running Buddies and Seven Miles

I'm afraid to run outside by myself.  It's true.  There are too many stories of women running alone and being attacked or kidnapped, as well as my own fear of overdoing it and not being able to make it back home on my own steam.  On the other hand, I was nervous to basically ask someone if they wanted to marathon train with me.  "Hey, I know we haven't talked a whole lot, but I know you're a runner sooo...wanna run a marathon?"  Awkward.  So it was with hope, excitement, and anxiety that I sent an email to a lady I go to church with and asked her if she would be my running buddy.  I needn't have worried.  She was great about it and I even ended up with two buddies instead of just one.  Score!  The other one is someone I had tested the waters with and it seemed she wasn't ready.  They're both great.

Running outside with these two lovelies is one of the best things that has ever happened to my running.  We run at the same pace (how lucky is that!), we all listen to music rather than chat, and they are wonderfully encouraging.  Running with them has been terrific because they are easy going and they know what they're doing and where they're going.  All I have to worry about is keeping up and listening to my body.  On the longer runs I've figured out that my right foot rolls to the inside as I run.  I'll probably need stability shoes to help with that.  In the mean time I just run wherever the street or sidewalk slopes down to the right.

This week's long run of seven miles was fan-flippin'-tastic!  After the Freedom Run I was sure that trying to go seven miles would be my doom.  I was wrong; it was great!  The hills were difficult but the breeze was a lifesaver.  I'm pretty sure I can do anything now.  One reason I was so nervous is because we had to go in the evening.  Usually I run in the morning when I have more energy.  I took a couple of Excedrin pills before the run to stave off aches and give me a little jolt of caffeine.  It was a good choice and I felt great at the end of the run.  I did end up getting kind of sick after I got home because my body needed to eject a few things, but it went away by morning.

Now this week brings a small bump up in distance during the week.  My short runs will still be 3 miles, but the medium run goes up to 5 miles.  I can do this!

Freedom Run 5k!!!

WOW!!!  This race was about a thousand times harder than I expected.  Bragging:  I've progressed to the point now that a three mile run is no big deal.  Not bragging: This run nearly did me in.  I had assumed it would be a really easy run and it would just be my regular workout with my training schedule.  I was going to pass out a few cards (which I did) and push hard to get a PR on a 5k.  My time to beat was 30 min flat, the time I got in December at the Santa Run.  The last two Saturdays I've done 6 mile runs.  Both of those were easier than this 5k was for me.  No joke.

Before, while I still looked lovelyish.  I'm #840.  I'd never met the two in the middle, but the other three are family friends.  The one on the far right is the one who organized the fundraiser.  The other two I know are her mom and her sister-in-law.

Hey, look!  It's my back!

What I didn't count on that day was the humidity.  Really?  Humidity?  Here?  I'm used to a dry heat.  And a touch of a breeze.  We had neither.  I also got a surprise from my monthly visitor that morning.  I swear that adds 15 pounds to each leg.  Neither of those were things I had any control over.  I did, however, have control over my pace.  I decided to be a big shot and keep pace with C, the one I'm talking to in the above pic.  That worked for the first mile or so until I told her to run ahead because I needed to slow down.  She ended up finishing more than four minutes ahead of me, so I'm glad I didn't try to keep up or slow her down.

It's my back again!  Betcha can't guess who forgot to bring her camera... 

I finally gave up and started walking a little after the halfway point.  I preferred that to complete collapse.  It wasn't the first time I would walk.  I did make sure that when I walked I was going pretty quick  I kept up with my music, which was fast.  At first I felt like maybe I wasn't doing my best, but the humidity really was oppressive to me.  If it gives you any idea, I spilled a little on my shirt when I went to a water station.  It took well over an hour to dry.  When I bought the pink shirt to run in I debated over the one I got and a tank top.  I sooooo should have gotten the tank.  Anyway.  One of the difficult things was that during the run I started to seriously question whether or not I really want to try for a marathon.  If I hated a short run so much then why on earth would I want to add another 23.1 miles to it?  However, one of the best pieces of advice I've ever received is "don't quit on a bad day."  So I'm not quitting.

Most of the race is flat, but the last part is uphill. Such a mean, dirty trick.  Toward the finish line I tried to pick up the pace a little and that was moderately successful.  I went faster but there wasn't a whole lot left to give.  I made it, though!  I went through the lines to get my souvenir water bottle and some food and watched the people around me.  I heard someone say, "Man, after Ragnar I thought this would be cake but it wasn't!"  I've heard how truly challenging Ragnar is so that made me feel like I'm less of a wimp.  I really had been disappointed not to run the whole thing.  I heard someone else ask their friend if it was worth waiting in line to get the special water bottle.  That's the hardest 3 miles I've run in a loooooooong time, so there was no way I was leaving without that water bottle.  I earned it, man!  In the end I'm actually pretty proud of how I did.  With the humidity and my other...uh...bodily ailments, I think I still did well.  Final time was 31:48.6 (10:15 pace) and I placed 55 out of 214 in my age division.  Not too shabby.  It was just complete misery while I was doing it.  I'll have to go for another PR in the future; it's okay that this one wasn't my best.

Now it's on to tomorrow's seven mile run.  I am once again apprehensive to do the long run because yesterday's three was so beastly.  I'm nervous for tomorrow and hoping for much, MUCH less humidity.

**UPDATE**  The professional pictures from the Freedom Run have been posted.  Find mine here.  If you look at picture 13 you'll see I apparently came in just behind "Ridiculously Photogenic Guy"... who is pushing a stroller.  Maybe next year I'll make it ahead of the stroller-pushers. :)

Independence Day Attire

This one's a quickie.  After making Q-ball's costume for the baby contest I had some leftover fabric and knew it would be perfect for shirts for the girls.  I already had McCall's 6737 pattern (a pattern that's not discontinued but actually new?  Miracles do happen.) on hand.

Meeting the princess.  The girls had not yet abandoned all semblance of being groomed. That happened later...and so did the potty accidents.

It was a quick sew.  I wasn't pleased with the width of the neck so I narrowed it on Pink Blur's top by cutting the contrast panel smaller. The sleeves also sew in a little funny.  It's probably not a pattern I'll use again but it worked well for it's purpose.  The front and back pieces are identical, making it super-duper easy to match stripes or other designs.  The shirts are pretty cute and the girls love them.  I think Blue Eyes will be able to wear hers another year.

My cutie pies with the sweet princess.  We had a great Independence Day!

Not What I Wanted...Better!

For years (YEARS!) I have wanted to participate in the Freedom Run on the Fourth of July.  Even back in the days of hating running only slightly less than I hate stepping on Lego pieces I still wanted to do it.  I wanted the cool shirt and I wanted to be able to do it.  I've never done it because I've never been ready for one reason or another.  This year I'm ready!  I actually considered running the 10k, but my training schedule has me down for 3 miles that day and I've been determined to stick to it religiously.

Last year's (or maybe it's for this year, not sure...) shirt and the measurements.  Because the two were connected.

Now that I'm all signed up and don't even see a 5k as particularly difficult (what did that happen?!?) I'm way excited.  I finally get to run along with everyone in their red, white, and blue tech shirts.  Because I've gotten better at running I've even been looking forward to seeing how much time improvement I'll have over my last 5k.  My last time was exactly 30 minutes and I'm pretty sure I can do better.  I've been looking forward to seeing how it goes.

Then something happened.  A friend of mine posted on Facebook that she was running the Freedom Run 5k in support of one of her former mission companions, Kassi.  I told her I'd see her there.  When she replied back she asked if I would hand out a couple flyers with a website for donating to help with the costs of Kassi's fight with brain cancer.  I said I would be happy to help.

The flyers

Not long after that the brakes in my head screeched me to a halt as I realized what handing out flyers would mean.  If I were to hand them out along the way it could seriously effect how long it takes to reach the finish line and that time is important to me.   As I read more on my friend's Facebook page I saw that those who are supporting Kassi could also wear hot pink and gray to be noticed among the sea of red, white, and blue clad runners.  That would mean not wearing the shirt I've coveted for so long and wanted to wear along with all the other runners.  And that was it.  The selfish part of me couldn't get past giving up the two things about this race that were most important to me.  I didn't want to do it anymore.  And then a thought occurred to me: I'm pretty sure Kassi doesn't want to have cancer or go through the treatments.  I bet her husband doesn't want it for his wife.  I bet their newborn daughter wants her mommy.  That certainly put things in perspective.

I've never met Kassi and, as she doesn't know me from Adam, I'm pretty sure our paths will never cross.  But I do know Lori.  She and her family live around the corner from us and moved into the development about seven months before we did, around the beginning of July 2011.  Her husband was in the final stages of brain cancer.  The day of the Freedom Run is the second anniversary of his death.  I know, love, and admire Lori.  She is raising two amazing children and supporting her family by running a preschool from her home.  She's pretty incredible.  I wasn't able to do anything to support Lori, but I can do this as a tribute to her family as well as to help Kassi and her family now that she has started her treatments.  So now I won't be running in my matching shirt and I may not beat my old time.  That's okay; this is better.

If you want to help and read more about Kassi, go to the donation website: https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/59c2/teamkassi/

Perfect Playtime Pants Pattern Review

Most of what I have blogged (or thought about blogging) this past little while has all been about marathon training.  There are things I've sewn but never got around to posting.  This is one of them.

A while back I was lucky to test the Perfect Playtime Pants pattern from Feather's Flights.  I loved the different options for length and that it's a unisex pattern.

Roomy and comfy

I grabbed some fabric from my stash to whip them a pair in the bloomer length.  These pants don't take long to sew and are a great instant gratification project.  There are pockets for the longer lengths and those are pretty cute.  I wanted the bloomers because Pink Blur was in serious need of some summer duds.

Matching top is modified from the Blank Tank pattern by Blank Slate Patterns

The pattern fit well and the instructions were thorough.  Pink Blur loves her new outfit and gets excited whenever I pull it out of the drawer.  It's perfect for the deathly warmer weather we've been having recently.  Now she's ready for BBQ season!

Check out Heather's stuff here!